Embracing Loneliness, Self-Worth, and Moving On
Hey friends! 👋 Welcome back to the Therapy Thrift Shop. Today, I want to share a bit about where I’m at lately—particularly around loneliness, an unexpected text to my ex, and the growth I've noticed in myself along the way. Plus, I’ll share a beautiful liturgy that really hit home. Let’s dive in!
The Unexpected Call of Loneliness
I’ve been feeling the weight of loneliness a lot recently. Working from home since the pandemic definitely didn’t help, but now, I’m finally starting a new in-person job! Honestly, I’m both nervous and excited. It's time to shake up the routine and surround myself with people again.
Part of this loneliness has been fueled by changes in friendships. The friends from my twenties have moved, gotten married, or started families, and while I love my life, sometimes it’s tough when your reality doesn’t quite match your expectations. But I’m learning to embrace where I am—and that means facing some things I’d rather leave in the past, like reaching out to my ex.
The Text I Maybe Shouldn’t Have Sent
So, in a moment of...let’s call it curiosity, I stumbled across an old hidden photo album on my phone. Seeing those sweet pictures from my early days with “Richard” (not his real name) stirred something in me. Before I knew it, I had texted him, just saying I hoped he was well.
A few texts led to a phone call, and for a moment, I thought maybe reconnecting wasn’t such a bad idea. But then reality hit. His old habits—the ones that made me feel small and unheard—surfaced just as quickly as before. That’s when it clicked: I’ve grown. A few years ago, I would have stayed silent, hurt, or even apologized for nothing. This time, I stood up for myself. I didn’t let his words define me, and I hung up when he crossed a line. It felt good. Really good.
Lessons Learned the Hard Way
Here’s what I took away from this whole situation:
Loneliness Can Cloud Your Judgment: Sometimes loneliness makes us look back with rose-colored glasses, forgetting why certain relationships ended.
Growth Means Standing Up for Yourself: I realized how much I’ve changed. I don’t let people treat me poorly anymore, and I’m proud of that.
I’m Okay Being Alone: Sure, I’d love a stable, loving relationship, but not at the cost of my peace. I like my own company, and I don’t need drama just to feel connected.
Clarity Comes with Time: I know now what I’m looking for and what I won’t put up with. I might give dating another go, but I’m not desperate for it.
Words Matter: Being called something hurtful (like “hag”) reminded me that I don’t have to accept that kind of treatment. I’m not here to be anyone’s emotional punching bag.
Finding Peace in the Process
After all that, I came across a liturgy on Instagram that spoke to me. It’s called “A Liturgy for One Whose Friends Have Moved On to a New Stage of Life” from the account Every Moment Holy. It beautifully acknowledges the grief that comes with seeing friends move into new seasons while feeling stuck in your own. Reading it was a reminder that while seasons change, God’s presence doesn’t.
Even if you’re not religious, I think there’s something universal about the message: honoring your feelings while allowing yourself to move forward. That’s what I’m trying to do—acknowledge the loneliness without letting it drive my decisions.
Take What You Like and Leave the Rest
If you’re going through something similar, know that you’re not alone. It’s okay to miss people, even those who hurt you. Just don’t let the past hold you hostage. Keep growing, keep standing up for yourself, and never settle for less than you deserve.
Thanks for being here with me, sharing this journey. I’d love to hear your thoughts—feel free to leave a comment or reach out. Until next time, take what you like and leave the rest. 💛
